Last Saturday, I attended a Church service that somehow brought some insights in my life. It was really a blessing for it enlightened me about things that I have pondered before. I wrote about tithes before and how perplexed I am about how it works. But that service was an eye opener. It was something that I need to hear. Something that was meant to happen but I wasn't able to anticipate it. It's funny because it was not the Church service my work mate invited me. He was supposed to invite me on the next Church service wherein a great speaker was to share a powerful testimonial. But I believe it was no accident that I was able to attend that. Because it helped me clear my mind about offering and giving. It was supposed to be a series of service about Wealth and Possessions: Biblical Perspective. It contained a lot of valuable wisdom and knowledge that I believe a Christian must know for the growth of his/her faith. 

The title of his 'speech' is 'Concerning the Collection' and it talks about giving to Christ. The sole core verse that centers upon is 1 Corinthians 16:1-4

"Now about the collection for God's people: Do what I told the Galatian churches to do. On the first day of every week, each one of you should set aside a sum of money in keeping with his income, saving it up, so that when I come no collections will have to be made. Then, when I arrive, I will give letters of introduction to the men you approve and send them with your gift to Jerusalem. If it seems advisable for me to go also, they will accompany me."

Before, I really did not put into heart the teachings of the Bible about giving 10% of your income or blessings to the Lord. I mean I didn't think it was important. I thought you just give to your heart's content and it's not necessary. That was before I didn't know anything about it. And then I had a Bible study way back in my home town where they gave me glimpses of giving 10% of your income. They said it was a requirement and there are verses in the Bible stating so. But the explanation wasn't enough. I was still bothered and perplexed about some things which I wrote about before. And what happened last Saturday was an answer to all of my speculations about it.

It made me realize that giving to the Lord is what He wants us to do as a Christian. The pastor gave some points about this. Pardon me for I cannot put them into words the way the pastor shared it and how clear and concise he was. But he stated that as a Christian, this is what we ought to do with both our hearts and minds put  into it. It also made me realize that it's not about the 10%, but we ought to give proportion to our blessings. It's not necessarily 10% because that would confine us to offer only 10% and it would become like a chore or something. Rather, it should be more than that. It should be given whole-heartedly and would serve as an offering of thanking God for the blessings that He has given us. If He has blessed us more, we ought to give more. Grace abounds the law. That is why we ought to give more than the 10% which was the law. When Jesus Christ came to this earth, it was because of God's grace to us. 

The pastor shared a lot of stories that were related to the topic at hand and they were so inspiring. He even said that no one is too rich to sacrifice and no one is too poor to give. This was shown in a Bible story about a poor young woman and a wealthy person who each gave something to the Church. And what he said was right. He made us realize that it is essential as a Christian to give to the Lord. He also enlightened us on where to give. He also mentioned that giving should not be on a whim. Not based on feelings. Not when you feel like giving. Not when you have enough. But rather it should be commitment to God. It is something that a Christian must do every week because that's what the Bible tells us. But it should not be something that is done just because of that sole reason alone. It should be done because you want to glorify God and that your offering speaks your faith towards God. 

Here are some principles of giving that the pastor enlightened us:
I. Giving is universal for all believers.
II. Giving is regular.
III. Giving is a personal act.
IV. Giving is intentional.
V. Giving is proportional to your blessings.
VI. Givingd is an unpressured response.
VII. Giving is responsible.

Today, I had a life-changing event. Well, it's not really that huge or big in the context of something actually happened that was so profound in how this world interprets. For me, it was a life-changing event because it stirred up my mind and gave me realizations that I believe is not just coincidence. But rather, it is a calling from God.

After days of mediocrity and feeling the cycle of the triviality of life is turning up its wheel again, what happened made me closer to the Light that is Jesus Christ. These past few days, nothing special really happened. But I admit that God had made changes recently in my life and he has answered my prayer. I am grateful because of it. I truly am. But somehow, the spark of my faith seems to fade. I acknowledged the good changes that recently happened in my life and I'm grateful for it. But, it seems as though I seem not to care. It's as though I have taken it for granted. I have not done enough things to show my gratitude to God. I have not poured out my heart to Him in the sincerest way and the deep connection was lost. When I pray, they were very short and my heart was not truly into it. When I have my quiet time, I just write the things in my head and they are not speaking directly to the Lord. When I read my Bible and my inspirational books, I just read them and not truly absorbing what's in it like I'm not understanding them. It was a time of mediocrity, normalcy, and ambivalency. It was a time when I was going through the course of time, just going with the flow, doing the things I ought to do and just plainly following the cycle of life. I was just staring into space, I could feel God's presence, but that's just it. I'm not doing anything at all. I wasn't sad. I wasn't happy either. I was just feeling normal. I worry about typical stuff like money, work, and friends. Even my family seem so distant. But I'm not worried about them. I'm just going through the motions of time. 

But what happened today made me think. It gave me realizations. It instilled in me fear. It instilled in me the drive to do something for the glory of God. It instilled in me that God is watching me and He wants me to create a ripple. A big ripple that will bring the people closer to Him. 

Nothing really big happened today. It's just that my workmate shared something to us that I know I just can't ignore and do nothing after that. It was about a girl who died and came back to life again. The story was never finished because there wasn't enough time for it to be finished. But she promised to give me a copy of the story once she has it. Anyway, it was about a girl who died and was brought to heaven and hell. She said that it was a true story. I remembered way back that I have read this similar kind of story. But I was very speculative at that time, I really did not embrace or absorb the story in its entirety and I had some doubts about it. But when my work mate shared it to us, it really had a big impact on me. This time, I believe it to be a true encounter and I want to know more about it. 

One of the things that bothered me about the story is the fact that there were a lot of people in hell. There's no doubt about it. Not with this crooked generation. I can see, hear, and feel it everywhere. That's why I have to stand my guard always and pray to God that I will not sway or be far from Him. Also, most of the people there were popular. Michael Jackson was even there. The girl asked why and the angel told her it's because he sold his soul to the devil for fame. I'm not really a fan of Michael Jackson so I wasn't really bothered by it. 

The girl in the story also saw someone she didn't thought could be there. For that person was near to being holy. Even my work mate when it was shared to her was shocked by this. The girl saw Pope John Paul II there with a snake around his neck. I was also shocked by this fact but it was not hard to believe. I'm not really a strict firm Catholic believer so it was not hard to imagine. I have my speculations with the teachings of Catholicism itself.

I was actually even more shocked by the fact that there is a place in Vatican itself where there are full of fetuses. There was even a documentary about it but I have yet to find it. My work mate said that nuns and priests also crave for the lust of flesh. Hence, the fetuses. Just thinking about it makes me sick. It's awful. And to think that the Catholic Church itself is very strict in implementing laws against abortion, but they are doing it themselves. In secret. It's awful. 

But what baffled me the most is that she saw an 8-year-old boy there. Why? How come? What is an 8-year-old boy doing in there? It was sad. The girl in the story cried when she saw him. If I was her I would've cried too. He's too young. But then my work mate told us that once you reached the point where you know what is right and wrong, you are accountable for your ways. She is right when saying that. But aren't we all given chances to change our ways and reach out to God before we die? I believe that God is merciful and His grace abounds and God forgives and repents our sins. But seeing an 8-year-old in hell is just too sad. 

The story of the 8-year-old is just like this--the boy was watching Dragon Ball and the mother gave orders to her child. The boy disobeyed her and the mother got angry. The boy ran outside and was hit by a car. I really don't know much of how the story goes because our work mate shared it to us in fragments. We were just in a chat room where everyone can respond and speak there mind and the story was not really shared in a way that we can fully comprehend. But I will wait for the copy and read it myself. 

Also, my work mate told us that we should be wary in the shows that we watch since some of them have hidden agendas in making us turn away from the things we ought to watch or do. She also stated that Dragon Ball is one of the cartoons with hidden sexual meanings that are not good for kids. Now this is probably one of the things that is hard to do. I am very fond of movies. I really am. But as a Christian, I know that I have to let go of the movies that I once liked since they contradicted to my beliefs (I'm into animes and such and psychological and bloody horror films O.O). She also said that we should honor our mother (or parents) which is actually in the Old Testament in the Bible. 

So that's the reason why he went to hell. But how about those other people who commit even more awful crimes than these, but they are given chances to change their ways and reach to God. Doesn't that boy deserve chances to change his ways too? But I guess we can really never tell the time or hour when our life is taken away from us. That is why we should always be ready and prepared.  

As what I have deduced from this new knowledge, I realized that, when you think about it, it's very difficult to go to heaven and one mistake can lead you straight to hell. It goes with a Bible verse that says something like narrow is the way to the Light but wide is the path that leads to destruction. So very true. 

When I heard about the 8-year-old boy, it just made me realize that much is required of us. It just says that only those who are truly worthy and deserving will go to heaven. Untainted. Unflawed. Pure. Holy. 

With this realization, it then actually made sense to what I have previously read about. It was about HOLINESS. It is something that perfectly describes God. Something difficult to attain. Something that is required of us. Being holy means surrendering your whole life to God. Being holy means being pure and undefiled by sin. What embodies holiness is the essence of Jesus Christ's life. 

From my understanding, this means giving up on things that does not contribute or disturbs your relationship with Jesus Christ. This means living a life that is pure. Living a life with Jesus Christ in your mind. That you are living your life for Him and Him alone. This is what greatly affects me. I know that I have my faith in Jesus Christ. I truly believe in Him. I read my Bible. I do my best to go to Church and to live a Christian life. But it's not enough. I have my shortcomings. A lot. I also feel persecuted a lot. That's probably why I don't do things for the glory of God that much. I just keep quiet because I don't want arguments. And I feel bad about it. I'm just too sensitive. Especially when it comes to attacking who I am as a person. Especially when I'm surrounded by people who are very different from me and who I feel contradicts my beliefs and the things I value. I need courage. I need strength. For Jesus Christ. And all I can do is pray for these things to unfold in my life. I pray that I will be strong enough to share God's message and to not be afraid of being persecuted but to handle it maturely and with grace. I really admire people like my work mate and my college friend who actually opened up this beautiful door for me. They had the guts to share what they believed in to the people around them without being afraid. I pray that someday I will be able to do that. For now, I think that the only way that I can talk about this stuff is to people that I have a deep connection with and that I know is someone who listens to what I have to say. Somehow, I have a hard time of sharing it to people when I feel that they cannot see what I am trying to say or if I feel that they refuse to understand it and be moved by what I have to say.